casting couch

Imagine a film premise was submittted on a whim to a company who had previously funded a film by the same applicant which made them a lot of money. If you imagined this company would then throw a huge budget to the applicant with almost no restriction whatsoever then you win a prize.
  Problem is simple. The premise itself means nothing. I'm going to make it up as I go along, but I have no convincing talent. Are you that talent? I will write you into the script but I need your character in advance. Who are you or who can you pretend to be. You will be flown from your place to Melbourne, then to FNQ and the beautiful garden city of Weipa if you make cut. I'm open to all new ideas and abuse.

I can play Dann, the zany and lovable bald guy, with tattoos and a fuzzy back. he has a tough exterior, and an even tougher interior. He doesn't like anyone... but he tolerates them because he has no other choice, and it's better than being all alone. He like to give his puppies scritchens and sing to them.

He is also not a white knight, but he likes a good tussle on occasion.

Chris is the world-weary author from Britain who hides his insecurities behind a mask of snide sarcasm and razor sharp British wit. His penchant for tea borders on the obsessive.

His appearance is a man who looks older than his years who wears a shabby black jacket and worn jeans, the only alchohol he drinks is cider.

Dann, that has possibilities, you may be too pretty for that kind of gritty. And Chris, buddy, Douglas Adams, as brilliant as he is, has no place in this one.

I have scars on my face and a beard. I can do gritty. I actually have... one...two... three? Three face scars. I AM GRITTY!

I can be gritty, just change 'tea' for booze, Chris is actually an author whose life went off the rails after his wife left him, he now drinks while he searches for a new meaning or purpose in his life.

I do have a picture of your character ripping a chunk of meat off a bone, wiping your mouth with an expansive wipe of the sleeve and saying " ahh whale, fuckin love it. They're nothin' but flat tailed tuna anyway. Now bring me a fuckin' lager and a slut  

Booze is an improvement but being affected by a woman and her wiles is still a bit out of scope. A change of POV is required. Also I hope everyone has a better Aussie accent than Rob Downey in natural born killers. I saw that at the cinema with an American girl. When the audience suddenley cracked up during a non funny bit I had to explain to her that we just realised he was trying to be Aussie, like that tool off Hard Copy. She thought he sounded pretty authentic.

His ex-wife  is a cocaine dealer who got mixed up in the triad gangs of London's East End and ran away from Australia to escape them. When Chris discovers this, he realises that she left him to protect him so he heads out to Australia in a desperate bid to find her before the triads do.

Upon the way, he runs across Dann, who is alone and broke. Chris offers Dann a nominal sum of cash and his friendship in exchange for his help in navigating the back alleys of Australia in an attempt to rescue his wife.

Along the way, Chris begins to see something isn't quite right with Dann, and begins to suspect he has more motivation to find his wife, and that their meeting may have not been as coincidental as he previously though...

Upon the way, he runs across Dann, who is alone and broke. Chris offers Dann a nominal sum of cash and his friendship in exchange for his help in navigating the back alleys of Australia in an attempt to rescue his wife.

Along the way, Chris begins to see something isn't quite right with Dann, and begins to suspect he has more motivation to find his wife, and that their meeting may have not been as coincidental as he previously though...

Dann is secretly an assassin hired by the Triads.  A twist that no one would see coming!

Also, hooray, Sherman is back!

I'm Benjamin Franklin, fuck you.

Isn't casting couch a porn site?

My name is Jack. I am currently workng for an un named agency. At present i am undercover working as a rabbi on russian nuclear submarine. My name for this excursion is Vladimir. I can not go into much more regarding this.

I am divorced as my ex wife thought i worked in a box making factory and the excitement of that got too much for her. I have a son i never speak to after a tragic gun incident - he tried to rob a bank and it went pear shaped.

I enjoy southern comfort with vimto and cant eat peanuts on a wednesday.

Any questions?

Quote from: sherman t tank on February 11, 2010, 05:31:41 AM

I'm open to all new ideas and abuse.

Get on the floor you little whore. Now put your legs over your head and piss into your mouth. You like that don't you?

Oh dear

I'm Daniel, the depressed guy(somewhat of a mix of Marvin from Hitchhiker's, and Sidney Carton from Tale of Two Cities) who's traveling the world because he has nothing to do. He doesn't say much, and he smokes a lot of weed. He also only listens to techno music.

Greetings friends!  I am the one called Nomad, hailing this day from a particularly sunny corner of Vinland.  One could say I am a simple person. Rather than force myself upon others, I tend to linger in the background and observe others. However, those I choose to open up to are sure to find I am a very friendly and loving person. I have my faults, as does everyone else--though I try not to let them affect my life too harshly, and am constantly trying to better myself.