The Oracle Speaks!
The sheriff was awoken from his slumber by a banging on his door. He rubbed his eyes as he got up from the jail cell bunk and unlocked the door. One couldn’t be too careful, after all.
He checked his gun and opened the door. There stood Rooster, obviously distraught.
“There’s been a murder sherrif! Wakka Wakka is dead!” She cried. “Ah went to get some change for the saloon like ah always do and there he was with three bullet holes in the back.”
Sheriff Saddam comforted her as best as he could, holding her close.
“It’s ok Rooster. Why don’t you go back to the saloon. I’ll handle the body.” He said in a calm tone.
The funeral had the whole town massed. Wakka Wakka was laid to rest in the miner’s cemetery for lack of a better place. Lord Wilmore stood before the crowd.
“My friends, the Sheriff tells me that this heinous act is likely the work of the traitors. Someone here killed Wakka Wakka. I don’t know why, but whoever it is likely saw him as a threat. But we must stand firm. With me as your mayor, I will do whatever it takes to ensure this is the last death of an honest man.”
“But how will we open the vault?” asked Tausami, owner of Tsunami Saloon.
“Yeah, wasn’t Wakka the only one with the combination to the vault?” The general store owner Colonel Gaydafi asked.
“I’m betting that Pongo did it!” Tausami yelled. “He was always jealous of wakka wakka.”
“Maybe I did it.” Nomad Joked but no one laughed.
“Now, now. There is no need to worry. We’ll find the killer and save our town. We can worry about opening the vault later.” Lord Wilmore spoke authoritatively. When he saw the crowd was still not calmed, he tried again “Folks, I know y’all have your money in that vault but rest assured, Wakka Wakka entrusted me with the combination, should anything happen to him.”
“Then open the vault!” Someone from the crowd yelled.
“I will open the vault when the matter is dealt with.” Lord Wilmore replied with annoyance in his voice.
“Communist!” Tausami yelled. He heard that word used once and it sounded pretty bad.
“If you’re the only one with the combination now, that makes you mighty suspicious mayor.” Nomad chimed in.
“He even tried to get me fired!” Rooster chimed in.
The crowd began to turn on him and he knew it. It was like back home in England. He was once a Lord in the House of Lords but escaped for fear of his life. And now, it seems, his life was in danger again.
The Sheriff, who lost the last mayor election, approached Wilmore from behind.
“Mayor, where were you last night?” He asked coldly.
“Lying in bed with my wife of course. Ask her, she’ll vouch for me.” Wilmore replied, stuttering slightly out of fear. The crowd before him, now with rope, looked ready for blood.
“I don’t need tah. “ Saddam replied then leaned in close, whispering into Wilmore’s ear “I’ve been sleeping with her for months.”
“You bastard!” Wilmore’s rage came out and his fat body rushed Saddam only to be stopped by the crowd.
“Mayor Wilmore. I can personally vouch for the location of your wife last night and that makes you a liar. As the only other person with the vault combination, you had motivation to kill Wakka Wakka. You have abused your power and corrupted the office of Mayor of this here town. “
He looked to the crowd.
“String ‘im up!”
Lord Wilmore was dragged, kicking and screaming to the second floor of the saloon where a rope was hung around his neck. He was given no final words. He was given no last rights. All we was given, was a kick in the ass off the balcony.
Lord Wilmore is dead. He was not a traitor.
It is night. Traitor Noob, send me your kill. Harlot Master, send me your guess.