So I went to the pool this morning. "One for swimming" I cheerily smiled at the zombie behind the desk.
"Have you got a membership card?" She mumbled.
"Indeed I do" I replied with a pleasant tone.
I proceeded to make my way into the changing room, got into my swimming gear and popped into the showers where I had a quick rinse and stretch before making my way to the pool. I then slipped into the water and the instant I did, the hot lifeguard woman that I like, blew her whistle at me and signalled angrily for me to get out of the pool.
I went back to the changing room, got dried, put on all my clothes and made my way back to reception.
I walked up to the zombie and asked her "Is there anything you should have told me when I handed you my card to go swimming about 10 minutes ago?"
"I'm so sorry , sir I..."
"No" I interrupted, "that's not it. What should you have told me?"
"Its ladies only swimming at the moment, sir. "
Stupid woman