DETROIT TIGERS SIGN PRINCE FIELDER TO A 214 MILLION DOLLAR CONTRACT

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theonlydann

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Intelligent Tigers fans say WHAT??? Why?

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Chris Spaghetti

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Re: DETROIT TIGERS SIGN PRINCE FIELDER TO A 214 MILLION DOLLAR CONTRACT
« Reply #1 on: January 25, 2012, 06:41:41 AM »
Prince Fielder was never likely to inheret the throne. As the illegitimate child of King Batsman XII, born to the King's Mistress it would have seemed obvious that the throne should pass to his legitimate brother, Prince Umpire.

That was before the start of the Cricket wars.

When Cricketers appeared on the shores of the Baseball Empire, the King reacted slowly and in a matter of weeks, entire villages were bowing down to Queen Wicket IV. The King ordered his troops to form a line at 4th Base, hoping to halt the tide of Cricket incursion.

The line was completed as the Cricketers appeared at the forward watchtowers, 100,000 Baseballers manned the line to give the King time to assemble an army capable of repulsing the Cricketers. General Pitcher was given the order to stand his ground, no matter what the Cricketers threw at him.

He didn't have to wait long. The Cricketers appeared just after lunch on the fourth day of waiting, a force more than four times that of the Baseball defense, Pitcher realised he was already out-numbered and out-flanked before the battle began. The defense was a massacre, the Cricketer forces wielded larger, heavier weapons than the Baseballers and their armour made them indomitable in combat.

After the battle, Prince Umpire rushed to the front lines against the wishes of his father and offered the Cricketers a peace treaty which would give the invaders half of the Empire. The Cricketers accepted. When the King learned of his Son's actions he became apopleptic and ordered the boy executed. Prince Fielder saw his half-brother die and fled into occupied Baseballovia.

There he heard of a group of rebel guerilla fighters called the Tigers who planned on launching a desperate plan to assassinate Queen Wicket and drive the Cricketers out. Fielder agreed and offered to lead the assault himself, hoping to prove himself to his father as well as save the empire.

The plan was simple, to wait until Wicket came to personally inspect First Base Castle, the country retreat of the Baseball king which had been surrendered by Umpire, and destroy the castle with her inside with hidden explosives. All looked like it was going to plan on the night of the visit, the explosives were set, the fuse primed and Wicket's guards on the lookout for bandits rather than guerrilla tactics.

Wicket settled into he throne room and the Tigers lit the fuse but disaster had struck, one of Wicket's guards had urinated on the fuse and the spark went out.

Prince Fielder knew that they had only one chance and led the charge to light  the explosives by hand, fighting the palace guards on the way. He lit the fuse and dived from the tower window, just as the explosives blew and killed Wicket.

With the Cricketers leaderless and disorganised the King was able to launch a valiant resistance and the lands were made clean of Cricketers. Batsman declared Fielder his legitimate son and promoted the Tigers to his Elite Guard.

In the memory of these events the modern Tigers purchased a statue of the great Prince Fielder for $214m and placed it in Home Run Square.

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theonlydann

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Re: DETROIT TIGERS SIGN PRINCE FIELDER TO A 214 MILLION DOLLAR CONTRACT
« Reply #2 on: January 25, 2012, 06:51:08 AM »

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Tgor

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Re: DETROIT TIGERS SIGN PRINCE FIELDER TO A 214 MILLION DOLLAR CONTRACT
« Reply #3 on: February 14, 2012, 07:18:07 PM »
There go the chances of the Twins ever having a shot at the AL Central title for 9 years....If they ever had one.

BTW The tigers needed a 1st baseman or DH.
I dont care what you think as long as it's about me.

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theonlydann

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Re: DETROIT TIGERS SIGN PRINCE FIELDER TO A 214 MILLION DOLLAR CONTRACT
« Reply #4 on: February 14, 2012, 09:06:34 PM »
There go the chances of the Twins ever having a shot at the AL Central title for 9 years....If they ever had one.

BTW The tigers needed a 1st baseman or DH.
No. They needed a third basemen. Miggy at third is not good. Inge at third is not good. 214 for a DH who is about 3oo pounds?

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Tgor

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Re: DETROIT TIGERS SIGN PRINCE FIELDER TO A 214 MILLION DOLLAR CONTRACT
« Reply #5 on: February 15, 2012, 03:15:12 PM »
Miggy and Inge will probably trade off 3rd base, and Miggy will play DH while not on 3rd switching off with Young (why did we ever give him away?)

To sum it up Detriot needed a 1st baseman more than they needed a 3rd.
I dont care what you think as long as it's about me.

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theonlydann

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Re: DETROIT TIGERS SIGN PRINCE FIELDER TO A 214 MILLION DOLLAR CONTRACT
« Reply #6 on: February 16, 2012, 04:05:14 AM »
You do know it's Delmon and not Dimitri we have, right? Also, WE ALREADY HAD A FIRST BASEMEN!!! We did not need an ADDITIONAL first basemen, and Miggy was an awful third basemen. We had Delmon we coulda used as a DH. This was a stupid signing, but i hope it somehow works out.

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Tgor

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Re: DETROIT TIGERS SIGN PRINCE FIELDER TO A 214 MILLION DOLLAR CONTRACT
« Reply #7 on: February 16, 2012, 02:20:27 PM »
I was talking about Delmon, the Twins traded him for no apparent reason just before a home game with the Tigers.
I think they needed to replace V-Mart's bat in the lineup, and they saw that Prince was thinking about leaving the Brew Crew so the jumped on him with an offer and he took it. Besides Inge's bat is not strong enough to be a full time starter.
I dont care what you think as long as it's about me.

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theonlydann

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Re: DETROIT TIGERS SIGN PRINCE FIELDER TO A 214 MILLION DOLLAR CONTRACT
« Reply #8 on: February 20, 2012, 12:55:34 PM »
Oohhhhh... you're a Twins fan. Duh.

Replacing V-Mart and COMMITTING 214 MILLION to an obese 1st basemen when we have THE BEST HITTING FIRST BASEMEN IN BASEBALL are two different things.

We know Inge can't be a full time starter. Or a starter at all at third considering his knees. The only two options were not Sign Prince or have Inge start at third.