Poll

Do you follow Satan's word?

No
12 (60%)
Yes
8 (40%)

Total Members Voted: 20

Satanic Followers

  • 7 Replies
  • 1060 Views
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Sarah

Satanic Followers
« on: December 30, 2010, 03:22:17 PM »
Hello everyone.
As a loyal member of the Church of the Children of Canaan, the Savior, Jesus Christ, has sent me on spiritual mission to uplift the sinners and spread the truth. He has sent me to help you relieve your sins by using the Testimony of Canaan (the Holy Book) to release you from Satan's grasp with proof that the earth is round.


Page 168,
"...and The Savior in His hands cupped the raw material and formed the earth into a sphere to reflect His everlasting love and life for His people..."

  

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James

  • Flat Earther
  • The Elder Ones
  • 5613
Re: Satanic Followers
« Reply #1 on: December 30, 2010, 03:25:41 PM »
Globularism is a form of Satanism.  As an apostate from the Round Earth heresy, I consider myself one of the godlier men of this godless age.  I sacrifice only at the altar of Truth.
"For your own sake, as well as for that of our beloved country, be bold and firm against error and evil of every kind." - David Wardlaw Scott, Terra Firma 1901

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EnigmaZV

  • 3471
Re: Satanic Followers
« Reply #2 on: December 30, 2010, 03:27:32 PM »
A Google search for "Testimony of Canaan" reveals no book titles.
I don't know what you're implying, but you're probably wrong.

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Chris Spaghetti

  • Flat Earth Editor
  • 12744
Re: Satanic Followers
« Reply #3 on: December 30, 2010, 03:58:51 PM »
I am a follower of whichever deity Godchecker.com tells me is hip.

Today I worship Gitche-Manitou

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Space Cowgirl

  • MOM
  • Administrator
  • 49797
  • Official FE Recruiter
Re: Satanic Followers
« Reply #4 on: December 30, 2010, 04:00:18 PM »
I like Satan's grasp, his hands are soft.
I'm sorry. Am I to understand that when you have a boner you like to imagine punching the shit out of Tom Bishop? That's disgusting.

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Lorddave

  • 18146
Re: Satanic Followers
« Reply #5 on: January 01, 2011, 05:58:23 PM »
Satan is just doing what God says we shouldn't. Since I think God is a dick, I generally don't do what he says. Thus, I follow Satan, indirectly.
You have been ignored for common interest of mankind.

I am a terrible person and I am a typical Blowhard Liberal for being wrong about Bom.

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Wendy

  • 18492
  • I laugh cus you fake
Re: Satanic Followers
« Reply #6 on: January 01, 2011, 06:03:35 PM »
I am a follower of whichever deity Godchecker.com tells me is hip.

Today I worship Gitche-Manitou

I use this method too. Ah-Puch is a pretty cool guy, you know. The worst thing, though, is when you get Aztec gods. It's so hard to find sacrificial virgins these days.
Here's an explanation for ya. Lurk moar. Every single point you brought up has been posted, reposted, debated and debunked. There is a search function on this forum, and it is very easy to use.

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parsec

  • 6196
  • 206,265
Re: Satanic Followers
« Reply #7 on: January 01, 2011, 09:32:33 PM »
bollocks

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« Last Edit: January 01, 2011, 09:34:09 PM by parsec »