Anyways, climate change is totally not happening because that would mean a disruption of Hadley cells, mictic systems, and oscillations, especially the southern oscillation. This is ridiculous because we all know that non-anthropogenic fishkills are on a downward trend, cyclonic phenomena have been reduced, and weather patterns are less extreme.
Wha...? Ha, I understood less than half of that! Well done good sir. But could I trouble you for a somewhat watered-down version?
Good to see more geologists here, I'm still at uni so no specialist subject just yet 
I'm not a geologist, just the progeny of a geologist. I'm more of a general environmental scientist and entomologist.
Alright, Hadley cells are air and water currents that run based on the Coriolis effect every thirty degrees of latitude dependent on temperature. In other words, the summer heats up water at the equator for the Northern Hemisphere, the warm water flows in a clockwise direction up to about 30 degrees, and then cycles back. This water then warms up the water at 30-60 degrees, rinse and repeat. Obviously, the heat transfer reduces further up. This explains the trade winds and is the driving force behind the jet stream. It also creates cells of water in which the middle point is actually higher than sea level. You'd think there would be a meniscus effect going on in the ocean, but it's much less pronounced and even the opposite in some areas.
Mictic systems are water systems that exhibit thermal turnover with seasonal change. Water heats up during the spring, picking up nutrients bringing them to a photic zone, and life begins. Opposite for fall. Only true for dimictic systems, although monomictic are common in non-temperate areas.
Oscillations are similar to mictic systems, but true for the ocean. While the ocean is actually a mictic system, the oscillations have greater global impact. El Ni?o and La Ni?a are examples.
Fishkills are often associated with hypo- or anoxic environments, usually associated with eutrophication and heat-stagnation. Fishkills are exactly what the sound like.
Cyclonic phenomena are just your basic wind-weather stuff: tornadoes, typhoons, and hurricanes. It is predicted that cyclones will become more common, although not necessarily more severe, during global warming.