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Topics - YL Groper

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The Lounge / Its been so long...
« on: October 31, 2007, 10:24:31 AM »
that all of my threads are gone.

Flat Earth Q&A / Exploding poop
« on: July 20, 2007, 02:40:05 PM »
Boston Police Blow Up Suspicious Looking Man
By Brian Briggs

Boston, MA – There were more tense moments today after Boston Police were forced to blow up a suspicious looking man near a lamp post.

An alert city worker called in the man after noticing that he had been leaning against the lamp post for more than ten minutes.

Officer Charlie O'Hara of the bomb squad said, "We got a report of a man loitering in a high-traffic area with a bulky coat and a backpack. We cleared the area, snuck up behind him, attached the explosives and detonated him."

Police later learned the man, Evan Johnson, was waiting for his girlfriend, Cindy Collins, who was getting a cappuccino at a nearby Starbucks. His backpack contained books and all that was under his coat was a "Wish you were beer" t-shirt.

Collins explained why Johnson was by the lamp post. "There was a long line at Starbucks, and Evan wanted to smoke so he waited outside for me. Next thing I know I look up and I see police blowing him up. I always told him that down jacket made him look puffy."

Mr. Johnson is only the latest scare to hit Boston. Last month a marketing stunt by a cartoon show paralyzed the city. Two weeks ago police shut down Boston's largest mall after a teen passed gas in an Abercrombie and Fitch. Just this week police blew up a traffic counting device.

"You can never be too careful," said O'Hara. "I'd blow up a hundred innocent people if I can prevent another 9/11."

The Lounge / Tobacco Flavored Poop
« on: July 20, 2007, 02:36:48 PM »
Tobacco Flavored Condoms!?

In order to promote safe sex among India's prostitutes, Hindustan Latex Ltd has developed "paan-flavored" condoms—making a man's...cigar...resemble the tasty Indian treat of betel nuts, spices and tobacco wrapped in betel leaves. At first you might say, "Sign me up!!" And we can certainly understand the enthusiasm. But are these prophylactics missing the point?

After all, don't we all smell like tobacco after a good night of partying anyway? I always considered that odoriferous menthol coating on your skin to be free with the purchase of enough drinks—a sort of invisible car freshener for your body, or 25-cent bowling bathroom cologne without the need for spare change.

I remember when taking a girl to a bar and getting her drunk used to mean something—and condoms were something you just pretended to wear. But give me a tobacco AND tequila AND rufie flavored condom...and that's a complete night on the town.

Flat Earth Q&A / worlds fastest poop
« on: July 20, 2007, 02:34:30 PM »
75-year-old has world's fastest private internet connection

75-year-old Sibritt Löthberg from Karlstad Sweden just got her first computer, but it didn't take her long to download all the necessary patches.

Swedish news site The Local reports that Löthberg's home has been tricked-out with a record-breaking 40 Gb/s connection - the first time a private residence has tapped into the internet at such high speeds.

The blazing-fast connection comes courtesy her son, Peter Löthberg, a Swedish optical internet guru working at Cisco.

Ma Löthberg's house was converted into a broadband dog-and-pony act in an effort to promote high-speed fibre connections as a commercially viable platform.

"I want to show that there are other methods than the old fashioned ways such as copper wires and radio, which lack the possibilities that fibre has," said Peter Löthberg.

According to The Local, the secret sauce behind the connection is a new modulation technique that allows data to be transfered directly between two routers up to 2,000 km apart - with no intermediary transponders. This allows information to travel over huge distances without data loss.

With her blistering connection, Sigbritt Löthberg will be able to download a full high-definition DVD in just two seconds. Now if only there was a place for a Swede to utilize such a speed advantage... ®

Flat Earth Q&A / Flat Middle Earth
« on: July 11, 2007, 02:16:59 PM »
Middle earth is flat. There isn't an ice wall, just ancient hobbit text surrounding everything.

Flat Earth Q&A / Common Criminals
« on: July 06, 2007, 04:35:56 PM »
ENID, Okla. - Detectives arrested a 12-year-old girl and her 10-year-old sister for allegedly abducting their neighbor's 1-year-old son and demanding $200,000 for his return.

Brandon Wells was safe back at home Thursday night, hours after intruders broke into his family's residence and took him while his mother, Sheila Wells, slept, police said.

"I've been doing this 181/2 years, and this is the first time I know of when a 10- and a 12-year-old kidnapped a 1-year-old," said police Capt. Dean Grassino. "It definitely ranks up there with the unusual crimes."

The siblings, who were not identified because of their ages, are accused of sneaking into Wells' home at about 5:30 a.m., taking Brandon and leaving a ransom note.

"If you want to see your son again then you won't call police and report him missing and you will leave $200,000 on the sofa tonight and we will return your son back safe," the note read, according to police.

The note was signed, "the kidnappers."

The plan began to unravel when the girls' mother saw them with the child, police said. They told their mother they had found the boy on the corner, police said.

As girls' mother tried to find Sheila Wells' telephone number, the 12-year-old returned to Wells' residence and told her it was the younger sister who was responsible for the abduction, Grassino said.

Wells immediately retrieved her child from the girls' home and police were called, Grassino said.

Wells said she knew the girls and had banned the 10-year-old girl from her home a few weeks ago, but did not say why.

The girls appeared in Garfield County District Court on Thursday afternoon and were taken to Community Intervention Center for juveniles. They have not been formally charged.

"I know they're so young, but they need to learn from their mistakes," Wells said.

The Lounge / Soundproofing a room
« on: July 05, 2007, 04:33:12 PM »
Its getting too loud guys. Cops keep coming...

I was going to post this on dark resolve but the board is down right now.

I need a cheap method for sound proofing my garage. I know alot about this but what i really need is some links to padding or foam or whatever. All the sites ive seen have shit that is $300 per 5'x6' sheet. Id like to sound proof 1/3 of a 3 car garage for less than $100. Ill hang layers of carpet and carpet pads if i have to if it will work and is cheap enough.

Anyone know where i cant get padding and foam? links please.

Flat Earth Q&A / Who is Lynx?
« on: July 05, 2007, 03:33:42 PM »
Who is this person?


Flat Earth Q&A / Im Dr. Rockso, The rock and roll clown
« on: June 29, 2007, 10:00:29 AM »
I do cocaine


Flat Earth Q&A / Someone want to clean these troll up
« on: June 27, 2007, 09:12:58 AM »
Whats going on the last couple of days? What site did FES get posted on for all this mess.

Flat Earth Q&A / what happened?
« on: June 26, 2007, 02:44:02 PM »
We had the most ever online today at 326

The Lounge / Myspace
« on: June 22, 2007, 04:20:48 PM »
What's your URL/User name?

And is anyone on Myspace IM?

Flat Earth Q&A / This place is dead today
« on: June 21, 2007, 02:48:54 PM »

Wake up

Flat Earth Q&A / Who has a shotgun?
« on: June 20, 2007, 04:40:55 PM »
Rosie O'Donnell to replace Bob Barker.

I hate this bitch

The Lounge / I thought Admiral Gimp-leg...
« on: June 19, 2007, 10:16:25 AM »
Was not going to be around anymore. What gives gayer? why are you still here stalking me?

Flat Earth Q&A / Robot Chicken...
« on: June 18, 2007, 10:44:09 AM »
Is stupid to me.

And the fact that they had an all night marathon, not letting me watch my favorite cartoons, on fathers day, is even more stupid.

Flat Earth Q&A / One lonely monkey
« on: June 07, 2007, 09:53:30 AM »
the man with the negative wingspan eats sourdough sue bread,
and hits his highest notes on tippietoe.
it's simple introspection when the sun is silent
and the florescents, with their blue,
make the plants call you a lonely monkey in a very large glass cage.


Flat Earth Q&A / Good TV
« on: June 01, 2007, 04:30:35 PM »
AMSTERDAM, Netherlands - A Dutch reality show that claims to be trying to draw attention to a shortage of organ donors said Tuesday it would go ahead with a program in which a terminally ill woman will choose a contestant to receive one of her kidneys.

The program, “Big Donor Show,” has been attacked as unethical and tasteless. One member of the Dutch parliament suggested the government should block Friday’s broadcast.

“We know that this program is super controversial and some people will think it’s tasteless, but we think the reality is even more shocking and tasteless: Waiting for an organ is just like playing the lottery,” Laurens Drillich, chairman of the BNN network, said in a statement.

He said waiting lists in the Netherlands are more than four years long and 200 patients die annually for lack of a donor.

The network identified the donor as “Lisa,” a 37-year-old woman with an inoperable brain tumor. During the show, she will hear interviews with the three candidates, their families and friends before choosing who will get her kidney.

The show is being produced by Endemol NV, the creator of the “Big Brother” series.

A spokeswoman for BNN said that there could be no guarantees the donation would actually be made, “but the intention is” Lisa’s donation would be carried out before she died.

That is because her wish to donate to a particular candidate “wouldn’t be valid anymore after her death” under Dutch donation rules, Marieke Saly said. If Lisa does donate one kidney while living, the other kidney may still be awarded to someone else on a national donation waiting list under the country’s organ allotment system.

Viewers will be able to vote for the candidate they feel is most deserving via SMS text message, but “Lisa will determine who the happy one is,” BNN said in a statement.

Saly could not say how much it will cost to send an SMS, but most TV programs charge around $1.35.

Joop Atsma, a lawmaker of the ruling Christian Democrats, raised the issue in parliament, asking the government whether the program violated any law.

“Is it desirable that public broadcasting would go down this path, and is there no way to send a strong signal that we reject this?” he said.

Education Minister Ronald Plasterk, addressing parliament on behalf of the government because the health minister was ill, replied that there were serious questions about whether the transplant would actually go through as BNN has advertised it — but that there was no way to stop the program from airing.

“The information I have right now tells me that the program is unfitting and unethical, especially due to the competitive element, but it’s up to program makers to make their choices,” he said.

“The constitution forbids me from interfering in the content of programs: Let there be no mistake about that, that would be censorship.”

He said that there were practical barriers.

“In every transplant the tissue of the donor and the patient must match as much as possible,” Plasterk said. “The doctors in this program can’t make any concessions on that front.”

There also was doubt whether Lisa’s organs could be donated at all because it might spread her cancer, he said.

“So it’s very possible that in practical terms we’re not talking about anything here, because it’s possible this transplant can’t take place,” he said.

Noting the shortage of donors, he said it was a good time for a debate on the question of what incentives to donate are ethical.

He cited the example of a Dutch funeral home that is offering discounts to the families of people who were registered as donors, and an idea presented by the country’s Kidney Institute to give registered donors preference on organ waiting lists.

Flat Earth Q&A / When will Lindsay Lohan Die?
« on: May 31, 2007, 03:42:59 PM »
Check out her death pool

You could win a blow dryer.

Flat Earth Q&A / Do you think my ass looks fat in these pants?
« on: May 31, 2007, 01:54:17 PM »

Flat Earth Q&A / If you could sleep with one person on FES...
« on: May 25, 2007, 10:06:46 AM »
Who would it be?

*Crosses arms and waits for nerds to chime in and hit Gayer up for Blow jobs*

Flat Earth Q&A / The truth
« on: May 24, 2007, 09:57:47 AM »
Plaque is a figment of the liberal media and the dental industry to scare you into buying useless appliances and pastes. Now, I've heard the arguments on both sides, and there is nothing to convince me of the need to brush your teeth.

I got rid of my teeth at a young age because... I'm straight. Teeth are for gay people. That's why fairies come and get them.

Flat Earth Q&A / FES has been dead and boring...
« on: May 23, 2007, 05:22:31 PM »
For the last hour. What gives? i use this as a resource to kill the end of my work day....Im getting nothing here and i have another 15 minutes

Man up.

Flat Earth Q&A / Hippo Girl
« on: May 22, 2007, 12:46:30 PM »

Hippo girl
The most repulsive thing I've ever seen
Hippo girl
You've never heard of feminine hygiene
But I love you
But your teeth stick out of your head
(Like yellow clothes-pegs)

Hippo girl
The merest sight of you is nauseatin'
Hippo girl
You're always soaked in your own urine
But I love you
Though you're covered in excrement
(Like a dung fountain)

Hippo girl
The foulest thing in God's creation
Hippo girl
You are an abomination
But I love you
You got me algae between your thighs
(Like a fungal jungle)

Hippo girl
Maggots crawlin' in your massive jaws
Hippo girl
Your body's fest'rin', pustulatin' sores
But I love you
Let's watch our hippo children grow
Like blood-hungry jackals


Flat Earth Q&A / Whats your girlfriends name and phone number?
« on: May 21, 2007, 02:04:56 PM »
Im helping X-Mas come early this year

Flat Earth Q&A / I think...
« on: May 17, 2007, 03:50:27 PM »
Another FE army should be gathered. We should have a war, keep the balance.

The Lounge / Ahoy
« on: May 15, 2007, 09:26:40 AM »
It honestly doesn't get any better than this...

The Lounge / Gayer, I see you...
« on: April 19, 2007, 10:21:26 AM »
You cant hide forever

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