The Flat Earth Society

Other Discussion Boards => Technology, Science & Alt Science => Topic started by: Thork on July 03, 2012, 07:32:23 AM

Title: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Thork on July 03, 2012, 07:32:23 AM
Those clever Americans with all their science, have tried to trump Europe on the eve of possible Higgs Boson news.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-18692830 (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-18692830)
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Lorddave on July 03, 2012, 07:41:17 AM
We be trollin yo.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Thork on July 03, 2012, 07:46:55 AM
Actually Dave, it was announced as a direct response to quell the fears of a distraught American public, having watched one too many discovery channel spoofs.

I was disgusted to learn
Quote from: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-18692830
The article was written from publicly available sources because "we don't have a mermaid science programme", National Ocean Service spokeswoman Carol Kavanagh told the BBC.
You don't have a mermaid science program? Why the hell not? And how can you make such outlandish sweeping statements when you haven't even researched the topic?
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Rushy on July 03, 2012, 07:59:27 AM
If we really wanted to trump the supposed "Higgs Boson" discovery, then we could just rejigger the LHC to produce a black hole, consuming all of Europe. Yeah, look at you, Europe, you're a singularity.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Thork on July 03, 2012, 08:00:45 AM
You've only just figured out that mermaids don't exist. Don't give me any of this 'America knows all the science' baloney.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Rushy on July 03, 2012, 08:12:42 AM
You've only just figured out that mermaids don't exist. Don't give me any of this 'America knows all the science' baloney.

Looks more like it is your country that has just figured out mermaids don't exist, since it was a UK site you posted. I'm sure your "scientists" asked our scientists "hey, do, uhh, mermaids exist?"

"....No?"

And then after receiving that answer, your "scientists" came back and told everyone the U.S. has no evidence that mermaids exist. What a shock it must be to you and your primitive culture.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Thork on July 03, 2012, 08:17:03 AM
No. The US government has announced that mermaids do not exist, as a direct response to enquiries made by its own citizens. Please read the article.

The BBC has merely reported this so as we don't forget in Britain, just how smart you are as a nation.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Rushy on July 03, 2012, 08:41:00 AM
No. The US government has announced that mermaids do not exist, as a direct response to enquiries made by its own citizens.

It doesn't mention this anywhere.

She said that at least two people had written to the agency asking about the creatures.

They were probably British.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Thork on July 03, 2012, 09:08:49 AM
No. The US government has announced that mermaids do not exist, as a direct response to enquiries made by its own citizens.

It doesn't mention this anywhere.
I realise that you too are an American, so I'll be patient.
Quote from: http://www.cbc.ca/news/technology/story/2012/07/03/mermaids-noaa-not-real.html
The National Ocean Service made the unusual declaration in response to public inquiries following a TV show on the mythical creatures.

It is thought some viewers may have mistaken the programme for a documentary.
It was aired in the US. They were US viewers ringing up the US government and it was the US Government department (The National Ocean Service) that made the statement.

She said that at least two people had written to the agency asking about the creatures.

They were probably British.
No.
http://www.cbc.ca/news/technology/story/2012/07/03/mermaids-noaa-not-real.html (http://www.cbc.ca/news/technology/story/2012/07/03/mermaids-noaa-not-real.html)
http://www.zimeye.org/?p=56853 (http://www.zimeye.org/?p=56853)

Incidentally, it seems that your not having a 'mermaid science program' is hindering your knowledge of the subject.
Quote from: http://www.zimeye.org/?p=56853
Last year Zimbabwe blew untold amounts of money and labour time through its ministry of Water Resources after government workers claimed to have seen mermaids, referred in Shona as Njuzu. It was claimed that the ‘mermaids’ were hindering dam construction work by intimidating and scaring off workers diving to the bottom of the lake or river to switch on the pump.

The minister responsible, Sam Sipepa Nkomo told ZimEye:
 
“The pumps are already there. All we want to do is to switch on. And my staff are telling me that they cannot switch on; when they switch on, water doesn’t go through the pipes because ‘the mermaids are blocking the pipes’.”

I think the US is up to its old tricks again. Deny deny deny.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Rushy on July 03, 2012, 09:34:59 AM
It was aired in the US. They were US viewers ringing up the US government and it was the US Government department (The National Ocean Service) that made the statement.

The second statement is an assumption. It simply says "the public," could be anyone. Only the English would be silly enough to mistake a this program for a documentary.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Saddam Hussein on July 03, 2012, 09:38:34 AM
What's the relevance of the article about Zimbabwe?
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Thork on July 03, 2012, 09:40:36 AM
It was aired in the US. They were US viewers ringing up the US government and it was the US Government department (The National Ocean Service) that made the statement.

The second statement is an assumption. It simply says "the public," could be anyone. Only the English would be silly enough to mistake a this program for a documentary.
Why would the English ring up the US government? We had a perfectly good Oceanic Science Service of our own, complete with mermaid science programs until your little announcement this morning.
http://jncc.defra.gov.uk/mermaid/ (http://jncc.defra.gov.uk/mermaid/)
>:(

What's the relevance of the article about Zimbabwe?
It was in the middle of one of the news articles about the US denying mermaids exist. It tickled me so I included it in a post.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Saddam Hussein on July 03, 2012, 09:43:57 AM
It was aired in the US. They were US viewers ringing up the US government and it was the US Government department (The National Ocean Service) that made the statement.

The second statement is an assumption. It simply says "the public," could be anyone. Only the English would be silly enough to mistake a this program for a documentary.
Why would the English ring up the US government? We had a perfectly good Oceanic Science Service of our own, complete with mermaid science programs until your little announcement this morning.
http://jncc.defra.gov.uk/mermaid/ (http://jncc.defra.gov.uk/mermaid/)
>:(

That bullshit acronym is false advertising!
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Thork on July 03, 2012, 09:44:49 AM
You're not taking this news very well, Saddam. :(
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Rushy on July 03, 2012, 10:44:10 AM
Why would the English ring up the US government?

To report in your status, like a good little satellite state.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Thork on July 03, 2012, 11:52:43 AM
Don't make me put on my red coat, dammit! >o<
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Rushy on July 03, 2012, 11:54:35 AM
Don't make me put on my red coat, dammit! >o<

Be sure not to forget your brown pants.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Around And About on July 03, 2012, 11:58:50 AM
Mermaids...how hot would that be, amirite?

The answer is not hot at all.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Thork on July 03, 2012, 12:03:10 PM
I don't remember the last time I saw a mermaid. I'll bet the f*cking Japanese have been eating them all.

Why isn't the Sea Shepherd making the public aware of this?
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Wakka Wakka on July 03, 2012, 01:25:42 PM
EVERYONE BACK THE FUCK UP! 

Do mermaids really not exist?  :'(
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Rushy on July 03, 2012, 01:57:55 PM
I don't remember the last time I saw a mermaid. I'll bet the f*cking Japanese have been eating them all.

Why isn't the Sea Shepherd making the public aware of this?

I'm sure they're doing what they can.

(http://echeng.com/journal/images/misc/whalewhores.jpg)
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Space Cowgirl on July 03, 2012, 02:06:13 PM
There are mermaids in Weeki Wachee  >:(
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: CheesusCrust on July 03, 2012, 04:08:13 PM
I think the mermaids are in their long hibernation period. I need more research material to come up with more details about these legendary beings.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Thork on July 03, 2012, 04:15:09 PM
There is no hibernation. You and your friends have been eating them, you b*stards! >o<
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: CheesusCrust on July 03, 2012, 04:19:37 PM
I don't know if my friends would eat them or not but I will admit that if I had the chance, I might consume their flesh.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Roundy the Truthinessist on July 03, 2012, 04:23:24 PM
Raw baby mermaids are a delicacy in China.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: CheesusCrust on July 03, 2012, 04:26:39 PM
I might travel in China for more research on these merpeople.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Rushy on July 03, 2012, 09:10:31 PM
Why should we care about mermaids anyway? Yeah, the top half is usually gorgeous, but what about that bottom half? Its nothing but fish tail. That's not cool.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Thork on July 04, 2012, 12:14:37 AM
Why should we care about mermaids anyway? Yeah, the top half is usually gorgeous, but what about that bottom half? Its nothing but fish tail. That's not cool.
??? That is how you imagine mermaids? That's the wrong way round entirely. The bottom half need to be the woman. Who looks at the mantle piece when they are poking the fire?
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Particle Person on July 04, 2012, 03:47:41 AM
what if there was a mernmaid with the bottom half is instead of a fish a womens legs
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Space Cowgirl on July 17, 2012, 09:57:05 AM
Oh god... my uncle has just seen the show and is wondering if the govt has been hiding the mermaids.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Lorddave on July 17, 2012, 10:22:03 AM
Oh god... my uncle has just seen the show and is wondering if the govt has been hiding the mermaids.

I'm sure 17 November thinks they are.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Space Cowgirl on July 17, 2012, 11:01:45 AM
The other night I watched the mermaid show for a few minutes, and then I realized it was the show that caused the US to announce that there aren't any mermaids. I think the reason it caused confusion is because they present the show as if it's true, and also because it's on Animal Planet. Some people think shows on the science channels all have to be real because SCIENCE. What it really is, is a "what if" show. What if the aquatic ape hypothesis is true? Then they went from there.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Chris Spaghetti on July 20, 2012, 02:17:33 AM
EVERYONE BACK THE FUCK UP! 

Do mermaids really not exist?  :'(

No, Neptune banished them all.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Raist on September 30, 2012, 10:11:37 AM
The other night I watched the mermaid show for a few minutes, and then I realized it was the show that caused the US to announce that there aren't any mermaids. I think the reason it caused confusion is because they present the show as if it's true, and also because it's on Animal Planet. Some people think shows on the science channels all have to be real because SCIENCE. What it really is, is a "what if" show. What if the aquatic ape hypothesis is true? Then they went from there.


Yeah a bunch of guys I knew were sure it was real. They called me an idiot and an ass hole for telling them there aren't mermaids. I never thought that in my life I would be called in idiot for saying there aren't mermaids....... When I was four everyone knew that there weren't mermaids, I'm 23 now and people have apparently forgotten this basic lesson.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: MrKappa on October 10, 2012, 07:38:53 AM
That's what happens when people lose their religion... I guess.

I mean if people can get up in arms about it. So Secularism wins.


Governments around the world should make a public announcement apologizing for Dr.Suess



Shame is forbodden
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Rushy on October 10, 2012, 08:38:16 AM
That's what happens when people lose their religion... I guess.

I mean if people can get up in arms about it. So Secularism wins.


Governments around the world should make a public announcement apologizing for Dr.Suess



Shame is forbodden

People wanting to believe in mermaids despite the lack of evidence and the silliness therein is the very definition of religion.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: MrKappa on October 10, 2012, 08:58:10 AM
Ah... Finally somebody with a brain.

People want to believe in God, Mermaids, Werewolfs, whatever...

The big problem is text communication, jmo... There is literally no way to read sarcasm and that get's more and more dangerous as anonymity and age groups blend together.


I mean stupidity is one thing, but it took me many years to realize that no-one gets my sarcasm.


The web might have been a little less engaging and a little less dense then, I don't know... but if people want to rant about mermaids, where is the harm?


From the article...

Quote
It is thought some viewers may have mistaken the programme for a documentary.

"No evidence of aquatic humanoids has ever been found," the service wrote in an online post.


Does that read like it's funny? Probably not to half of the BBC readers. jmo...


Then at least another half are probably going to take it seriously enough to get vigilante about it.




When everybody knows, the ocean is for the most part totally underwater and unexplored and Mermaids are fast like Giant Squids. These are brand new discoveries within the last few years... not making it up...

Unknown World - Giant Squids (http://#)




But in all honesty... what really pisses me off, and this is just a hunch, the BigFoot episode of Ancient Aliens, that gets the most runs, doesn't it?

Not because people are interested in BigFoot... Come On... It has to be because it's the most stupid of them all while the others have real educational value.

Again... jmo...



BTW... whoever runs this forum... it's like lightning compared to some others...
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Space Cowgirl on October 10, 2012, 10:58:25 AM
I hated the bigfoot episode, and the Hitler episode of Ancient Aliens.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Vindictus on October 10, 2012, 12:59:45 PM
You don't believe in bigfoot?!
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Raist on October 10, 2012, 07:12:38 PM
Ah... Finally somebody with a brain.

People want to believe in God, Mermaids, Werewolfs, whatever...

The big problem is text communication, jmo... There is literally no way to read sarcasm and that get's more and more dangerous as anonymity and age groups blend together.


I mean stupidity is one thing, but it took me many years to realize that no-one gets my sarcasm.


The web might have been a little less engaging and a little less dense then, I don't know... but if people want to rant about mermaids, where is the harm?


From the article...

Quote
It is thought some viewers may have mistaken the programme for a documentary.

"No evidence of aquatic humanoids has ever been found," the service wrote in an online post.


Does that read like it's funny? Probably not to half of the BBC readers. jmo...


Then at least another half are probably going to take it seriously enough to get vigilante about it.




When everybody knows, the ocean is for the most part totally underwater and unexplored and Mermaids are fast like Giant Squids. These are brand new discoveries within the last few years... not making it up...

Unknown World - Giant Squids (http://#)




But in all honesty... what really pisses me off, and this is just a hunch, the BigFoot episode of Ancient Aliens, that gets the most runs, doesn't it?

Not because people are interested in BigFoot... Come On... It has to be because it's the most stupid of them all while the others have real educational value.

Again... jmo...



BTW... whoever runs this forum... it's like lightning compared to some others...

Ancient aliens has no educational value. They simply take things and create an alien mythos around them because the people on the show in general lack fundamental understanding of the concepts involved. It is myth creation in the modern age and the hilarious part is they aren't even that creative. Half the time they simply take an ancient myth and replace the word "gods" with "aliens" over and over and over. I was taught growing up that ancient myths generally were our uneducated ancestor's attempts at explaining the past, I know get to see their uneducated descendants attempting to reexplain the past.
Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: Space Cowgirl on January 09, 2013, 11:26:56 AM
EVERYONE BACK THE FUCK UP! 

Do mermaids really not exist?  :'(

MERMAIDS DO EXIST... and you can eat them!

http://salaficentre.com/2012/11/existance-of-mermaids-rulings-regarding-them-shaikh-al-fawzaan/ (http://salaficentre.com/2012/11/existance-of-mermaids-rulings-regarding-them-shaikh-al-fawzaan/)

Quote
It is known that the ocean fish that live exclusively in the seas and oceans are permissible to eat due to the hadith, “هو الطهور ماؤه الحل ميتته”, “It is pure and purifying its water [i.e. the seas] and its dead animals are permissible to eat”[i.e. that which dies in the oceans from its animals exclusive to living within it can be eaten even without slaughtering], with that regard Shaikh Saleh al-Fawzaan was asked about the entity recognised and known as the “mermaid” and the ruling upon it in terms of hunting it and eating it since it is also from the fish of the sea etc.

Questioner, “Shaikh, some experts and specialists in sea-life and fish mention that there is a fish that has a head like the head of a woman, and she has hair and a face like a woman, so is it permissible to eat it…and that is what they term as the “mermaid”?

Shaikh al-Fawzaan, “There is the “human of the ocean”, there is something from a type of fish upon the appearance of humans, they call it the “ocean human” [otherwise termed as "mermaid"] and it can be eaten, it is from the items that can be caught and eaten from the sea, yes, even if it was upon the appearance of a man or woman”.

Title: Re: US scientific breakthrough
Post by: geepun92 on January 31, 2013, 11:43:42 PM
Why doesnt God hate Africa? Fucking cruel bastard