How to be a Troll

Alright; get a pen and paper; I'm going to teach you the conceptual physics behind being a troll. 

When you say something to a person, the vibrations in the air that cause the sound from your mouth that goes into the person's ear and mixes with the eminating frequency of the person's thoughts. When these two frequencies come together, they can either have constructive interference or destructive interference.
Constructive interference between the two waves results in agreement, while Destructive results in disagreement.

At the same time, the force exerted by the vibrating waves in the wind happens to be strong enough that it's capable of blowing sand in the person's vagina, which causes them to start to get itchy down there. And in trying to do something about said sand without using their hands, the person will proceed to accidentally bunch their panties up, which also causes massive irritation. One variable that could also effect how much this effects the final result is how enthusiastic the person is about the subject. If they don't care really, then it shouldn't always be too big of an effect, but if it's something where they constantly have their hands glued to their cocks, for example, fanboiism, then the irritation would be especially soar due to the wear in the skin from constant masturbation. And in some cases, it could even result in bleeding, which can easily be confused with PMS.

Now, the destructive interference in combination with the sand in the person's vagina causes a massive emotional shift in the person's attitude from positive to negative, thus resulting in the person getting all pissy and whiny about the subject at hand.

Drinking makes everything better. Except your judgement on women. Last time i was on the beach i got really hammered and there was this chick........

Well, thank god I lost my virginity to a hot chick. I threw a party, and got ass from this not skinny, but not fat chick. All her stuff was decent, so that was good. It wasn't like she was a walrus, but she could have used a treadmill a bit here and there too. I'm just glad I didn't fuck the hot chick that probably had a scorching case of herpes...

But you're right about the fat ones. Last dick and all...

Derailed